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Hi! We’re your hosts Emma and Fin! We’re a married couple in our late thirties and we’ve been exploring non-monogamy in different ways since nearly the beginning of our relationship more than twenty years ago. But, this podcast isn’t about us…
We strongly believe there isn’t a “right way” to be non-monogamous or even that non-monogamy is better or more evolved than monogamy or any other relationship style. Every week we interview people from across the spectrums of gender, sexuality, and relationship style to learn from their incredible and powerful personal stories.
Each episode is a unique perspective and personal story… Pick one that sounds interesting and give it a listen!
We hope that by sharing the amazing journeys of those who are redefining and pushing the limits of what’s possible in relationships that we can show people that they’re not alone and inspire us all to embrace our true selves so that, together, we can open minds and live authentically without shame.
Episodes
Oct 8, 2025
Oct 8, 2025
1 hr 10 min
Nyxie did the serial monogamy approach to relationships from the time they started dating until they were in their early twenties. That's when Nyxie realized they didn't necessarily need to be in a relationship to get many of their needs met and so they began exploring solo polyamory. However, it was the early 2000's and the language didn't quite exist yet so Nyxie affectionately refers to this as their "Slut Era."
Nyxie's Slut Era lasted until they met their spouse (who was also non-monogamous) about 19 years ago. Early in their relationship they decided together that they wanted to be monogamous for a while. And so they did. Right around the beginning of 2020 they decided their kids were old enough and it was time to open up again...
Today, Nyxie and their spouse are both exploring non-monogamy in their own unique ways. Nyxie is currently in a triad, has a submissive, and a "whole galaxy" of play partners. In this wonderful interview Nyxie dives into all the nuances of their relationships, exploring kink, raising a family, and navigating non-monogamy with a spouse who has a completely different approach.
Nyxie isn't just passionate about sex, kink, and relationships in their personal life... It's also their life's work!
From Nyxie's website:
Nyxie Noc is a seasoned and compassionate Domme with decades of experience as a sex worker, fetish content producer, and educator in kink, consent, and advocacy. It has supported conduct and consent teams for various kink and sex-positive organizations and has provided safer-play orientations to over 850 participants, along with personnel orientations to more than 100 staff members within these communities.
Nyxie’s work is driven by a passion for the freedom of expression found within kink, and it values the transformative power of every scene and interaction. It is dedicated to creating safer, more inclusive play spaces and fostering supportive communities.
Please check out all of Nyxie's work over on their website!
Oct 1, 2025
Oct 1, 2025
1 hr 17 min
Rowan and Aeryn's relationship began a bit ambiguously about a decade ago and now they've been married for just over four years. They started out as best friends and Aeryn was sort of doing non-monogamy without the labels or framework. By his own admission it wasn't exactly the most ethical approach. As he puts it... "I was not good at monogamy."
In this beautiful conversation Rowan and Aeryn take us through the ups, downs, and realities of figuring out love, relationships, parenting, their individual sexualities and genders, and life. It hasn't been easy but about two years ago everything started clicking and they found their stride a bit. They're currently in a triad, Aeryn has a few other partners, and Rowan is dating here and there.
This interview is bursting with love! The way these two love and support one another through thick and thin is such an inspiration and we hope you enjoy this chat as much as we did!
Oh! And don't forget to check out Aeryn's karaoke chops!
Sep 24, 2025
Sep 24, 2025
56 min
Sarah is back! We last had the pleasure of talking with Sarah back in the beginning of 2022 on Episode 217 and a lot has changed since then... Spoiler alert: Sarah is now a mother! Today, Sarah catches us up on her adventures from the last few years and we dive into her journey into motherhood, how she and her partner navigate dating as new-ish parents, and what her shift towards polyamory has looked like.
Sarah is also a writer and coach who's dedicated to helping people have more secure, intimate, and exciting relationships! You can learn more about Sarah and her work on her website: www.monogamish.me
Sep 17, 2025
Sep 17, 2025
1 hr 14 min
Kristen's journey is one of perseverance, resilience, curiosity, and self-discovery. She refers to her thirties as her "waking up period" and her forties as her "sexual self-actualization." Now in her fifties, she feels like everything is integrating together... She currently identifies as a relationship anarchist who's excited about, and open to, the infinite possibilities and uncertainty of life. Kristen's story is incredibly powerful and inspiring and we hope you get as much from it as we did!
Kristen is also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) who works in California. You can find more information about her work as a therapist on her website here and you can learn more about The Non-Monogamy Card Game here!
Sep 3, 2025
Sep 3, 2025
1 hr 12 min
Carrie and Drew have been married about 10 years and are high school sweethearts who grew up in pretty religious families with purity culture heavily influencing them both, and their partnership. A few years ago Carrie found a queer content creator and therapist on Instagram who opened her mind to the possibility of choice for herself for the first time in her life.
Around this time, Carrie and Drew did a yes/no/maybe quiz about sex and discovered that they shared an interest in exploring with other people. So, they started talking about it... a lot... and eventually decided to make a profile on a dating app to see if they could make the fantasy a reality. And, they did!
Carrie vulnerably takes us through growing up with the pressure and confusion of religion and purity culture and the impact these had on her sexuality and on their relationship. She also shares about the experiences she and Drew had with another couple before ultimately deciding that the amount of energy it took for her to remain regulated while swinging was too much.
Carrie and Drew still consider themselves religious and while swinging isn't the best fit for them at the moment, they're still seeking new ways to explore the endless possibilities of sex, pleasure, and intimacy together.
Aug 27, 2025
Aug 27, 2025
59 min
Ayala first read The Ethical Slut in high school and actually started dating non-monogamously from the beginning of her relationship explorations. It wasn't until about a decade later that she intentionally set out to see what monogamy was all about.
Today, Ayala identifies as ambiamorous... Content and happy with either monogamy or non-monogamy, depending on the relationship. This interview with Ayala is full of so much wisdom and insight and is just a really lovely conversation about her relationship journey.
One of the things we love is when we have the opportunity to talk to therapists about their own relationships and we got to do just that with Ayala! Ayala is a sex and relationship therapist who describes herself on her website much better than we ever could!
I’m Ayala Kalisher, a therapist who specializes in helping people access more safety, connection and pleasure in their lives. My approach blends traditional and cutting-edge modalities to help clients navigate stuck patterns, relationships, and personal growth with more ease and authenticity.
I believe therapy should be a place where you get to feel seen, supported, and empowered. Whether you’re seeking relief from painful past experiences, struggling in your relationships, or looking for a therapist who isn’t afraid to talk about sex, I welcome you as you are.
Oh! Ayala also co-created The Non-Monogamy Card Game, as well! Please head over to Ayala's website to learn more about her work and don't forget to grab a copy of her card game! Enjoy!
Aug 20, 2025
Aug 20, 2025
1 hr 52 min
Courtney and Derek were both on the show separately over the past two weeks and today we're delighted to bring them on together to tell their very own love story! Both of their individual stories are incredible and we definitely recommend listening to them but you will NOT be lost today if you haven't already listened.
Courtney and Derek's story stands on its own and it's a love story for the ages! Trigger warning... This is a sappy and mushy love story told in great detail and we're so here for it! It's also full of laughter and hilarious anecdotes!
Courtney and Derek met online a few years ago and since then have fallen pretty madly in love. Today's interview is unique in that we get to hear what was going on for each of them as they began forming their partnership while the imperfect human-ness of life swirled around them.
Aug 13, 2025
Aug 13, 2025
1 hr 30 min
Courtney just turned 50 and has been exploring polyamory and non-monogamy for the last three years or so... However, her story begins long before she and her husband of 16 years opened their relationship in 2022. Today, Courtney takes us all the way back to the first time she had simultaneous crushes at age four... Rocky and Superman!
Today's interview with Courtney is full of laughter, joy, heartbreak, whirlwind relationships, self-discovery, and beautifully vulnerable and powerful stories of life and love. Join us! You won't regret it.
And! If Courtney's story resonated for you and you're looking at real estate in the Asheville area, please reach out to her through her website!
Aug 6, 2025
Aug 6, 2025
1 hr 19 min
If you were thinking of skipping this one, consider rethinking that...
Derek first learned about polyamory from one of the original writings on the subject in Green Egg Magazine back in 1990 (see link in show notes below)... He was in his early twenties and showed it to his college girlfriend and they sort of jumped right in! They explored non-monogamy together for a few years before parting ways and Derek found himself "scared back into monogamy" for many years.
Fast-forward just a couple years and Derek gets married in 2015... When he met his wife, Kay, a few years prior he brought up the idea of non-monogamy but she wasn't interested. However, she brought the idea back to him in 2016 and they decided to open their relationship for about a year before starting a family.
When their son was about three they decided to open up again and during the time they had closed their partnership Kay had come out to him as queer. Then, around 2021 Kay came out to Derek as a lesbian.
Today, Derek and Kay are nesting co-parents and are rebuilding their friendship. Derek also has a girlfriend of about 18 months who lives nearby and describes himself as ambiamorous... Comfortable with both monogamy and non-monogamy.
Join us today as Derek shares his incredibly powerful and beautiful story.
Jul 30, 2025
Jul 30, 2025
1 hr 23 min
Marla has been exploring and practicing non-monogamy for about 20 years after learning about it during their first year of college. After getting out of their last monogamous relationship early in their college experience, Marla fell in love with their best friend and never really looked back. Like many of us, they were kind of making it up as they went and figuring it out along the way.
Today we have a fantastic conversation with Marla about their journey, their struggles and triumphs, as well as the wisdom they've earned along the way. We dig into the reality of being an imperfect human, the importance of relationship repair, queer-platonic partnerships, and everyone's favorite topic... Hierarchy!
More about Marla from their website: www.polyamarla.com
Marla (they/them pronouns) is a relationship therapist and educator specializing in non-monogamy and *2SLGBTQIA+ identities. They have been practicing polyamory since 2005, and facilitating programs on the subject since 2009. (*2Spirit, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex, Asexual, and beyond)
Like you, they are a fabulous and sometimes messy human being. As a member of so many of the communities they support, Marla takes accountability when they’ve made mistakes, and doesn’t shy away from challenging conversations.
Their goal is to provide support and education for people who want to understand or practice non-monogamy. They advocate for the health of non-monogamous communities by offering services to people within, and adjacent to those communities.
Please check out all of Marla's work on their website and don't forget to grab a copy of their brand new book Nonmonogamy and Defying a Paradigm!